Good Times!

So looking back at my last few posts, I realized they have been somewhat down and I felt I needed to change that. Although, the last month has been trying and difficult on Scott and I and the rest of our family, we are still doing well and had some great moments!

We had our first camping trip of the year over Memorial weekend and it was a lot of fun! It was a little wet and muddy from the recent storms, so keeping Tanner out of the mud was a little bit of a challenge, but overall we had a really good time! We got to break out the four-wheeler for the first time this year and found some great trails, and I also found a Moose shed that now looks great in our living room! And anytime we can get into the mountains and do a little fishing, we are happy, especially Scott and dad!!

After I was released from the hospital I was given the go ahead to go to NM and have a good time. Scott was able to go with his friends for their camping trip. And I know we both needed this weekend after the last week had been so up and down! New Mexico was a blast! I drove down with Katherine and my sister in law Amy. I was finally able to go and see Lindy and Shawn's (Scott's sister and her husband) house, and it was beautiful! They have done such a great job on it, and just getting the opportunity to spend a little time with them was great! I really can't say how lucky I am to have those two as sister in laws! The wedding was also a blast! It's good to be reminded what good friends really are, and I have some of the best, they really made sure I had a good time and got my mind off other things!!

After getting back from our weekend fun, we both had to go back to work, which is never all that exciting! :-) But I only had to make it a week and a half before my family reunion in Utah. Unfortunately, Scott couldn't make it to this trip, and I know he was disappointed, but he will be making it the next time!! We had a blast in Utah!! Seeing all the family was wonderful, I really couldn't have asked for a better time!! It had been so long since I had seen so many of them that it was great to catch up on the last 7 to 8 years of life with everyone! To see all their children and meet husbands/wives, and just to enjoy the company of a good family! The house we stayed in allowed us all to be together which was great, late nights of Rock band and just talking. Then the days were filled with playing at the pool or day trips which included a picnic and walk to some waterfalls, a petting zoo, rafting, and of course a quick trip to Cabela's. It really was one of the best trips I've had in a while, I'm glad I had the chance to go and that so much of our family could make it!!

We have a family trip with Scott's family planned in just a week now to go out to California for one of his cousin's wedding over the 4th of July weekend. We are both really looking forward to this trip as well! I haven't seen some of his family since his sister, Lindy, got married five years ago so it will be good to see them. I'm also really excited to see the racetrack, Los Alamitos, out there that Scott's dad has been training at this year! I have never been out there and I have really been missing going to Arapahoe park on the weekends here, so it will be a blast to see him in action again! And we are hoping to try to go to Disney Land or the beach one day, so no matter what it will be a fun trip! And I know we are both looking forward to getting to spend some time with his family!

And once we are back from there, we have a month to recover before it is off to Florida! I can honestly say I have never had this many trips/vacations planned for one summer, but it is exactly what we are needing! And I hope this proves that though we have been a little stressed, and I have been really scared, our family and friends have been there to pick us up when we needed it the most. And we are still enjoying the life we have together!!

Scary Moments

The last few weeks have been a whirlwind of emotion and turmoil for me, I don't even really know where to start...

Four weeks ago I got back from a camping trip and felt very weak in the legs. I didn't really think much of it until I started limping because the left one was so weak. Then one morning I wake up to find my right leg numb from the knee down, I was terrified. Thankfully, Robin was able to get me in to see the doctor she works with. He ran a bunch of blood tests and took an x-ray of my spine. He couldn't find anything definitive but thought it might be a spinal injury as my legs were affected the way they were. He was going to schedule MRI's, however, by the time the weekend was over, the numbness had moved up my entire right leg and he didn't want to risk waiting. I was admitted to the hospital on June 2nd for two days. While there, they drew blood almost continuously, did an MRI of my brain, upper spinal cord, and lower spinal cord twice, once without the contrast dye and once with. The doctor found a lesion on my 9th vertebrae, but nothing on my brain, which was a relief. But now they needed to test my spinal fluid, so a spinal tap followed...Ouch!! It was painful, but I survived! Before being released I also had a chest x-ray. Over the next few weeks I tested negative for everything I could possibly think of. And after being released from the hospital my left side also became numb, which I was worried about at first but after speaking to the Neurologist he assured me anything two to three inches above my belly button (which is where that vertebrae is located) could be affected.

So right now they are calling my condition transverse myelitis, which is an inflammation of the spinal cord that can be caused from an injury or an infection. With me, because I tested negative for a great deal of infections, they say they may never know what caused it. But the possibility that this is my first presentation of MS is there. I'm trying so hard to stay positive about this because I know it will help the outcome, but I have my moments! From what I have read it says only a small percentage of people go on to get MS who are diagnosed with Transverse Myelitis. And I have also read that only a very small percentage of people who have no brain lesions and test negative for the MS bands panel from the spinal fluid go on to get MS. Which is good news, as I had no brain lesions and tested negative for the bands during my "attack" or "episode". I have been having blurred vision in my right eye, which has been very bothersome, but I also went and had this checked. My eye doctor was great and ran all the MS tests he could and I tested negative on those as well!!! So I really think this is all very good news!! And I have to continue to tell myself this on a daily basis, because it can be difficult. There are moments where it is just so apparent what could be happening...Last night Scott put his hand on my side as we were falling asleep and I couldn't feel it. It nearly broke my heart, but then I had to remind myself that knowing it was there was enough for me. And I have gained full feeling and strength back in my legs, so I could regain feeling in my side...

I think what is difficult for me right now is the unknown. As much as the tests are coming back positively, I still have to accept they aren't definitive and every case is different. The waiting is also tough. I will have to be monitored and have MRI's to watch to see if I have anymore lesions appear. I've got to stay hopeful...And I'm trying. Everyday...It has also reminded me how lucky I am to have my life. And to have the support of a wonderful family and amazing friends! I don't know how I would have made it through these last few weeks without them. I love them...